Monthly Archives: November 2012

Project Grateful 365: Day 13 – Happiness revisited

I found this off the Facebook wall of Y and found myself pondering about this quote/short prose for a long time.

“Unhappy men are all alike. Some wound they suffered long ago, some wish denied, some blow to pride, some kindling spark of love put out by scorn- or worse, indifference- cleaves to them, or they to it, and so they live each day within a shroud of yesterdays. The happy man does not look back. He doesn’t look ahead. He lives in the present.

But there’s the rub. The present can never deliver one thing: meaning. The ways of happiness and meaning are not the same. To find happiness, a man need only live in the moment; he need only live for the moment. But if he wants meaning – the meaning of his secrets, his life – a man must reinhabit his past, however dark, and live for the future, however uncertain. Thus nature dangles happiness and meaning before us all, insisting only that we choose between them.”
– Jed Rubenfeld, The Interpretation of Murder

I don’t quite agree with the dichotomy he presents between happiness and meaning but yet there is still a grain of truth in his wonderfully phrased prose. Personally however, the core of my being still feels that one can be happy living in the moment, yet be introspective about his past. I mean you have two choices, you can recognize and make meaning of an event happened, choose to stay and moan about things or just move on. Moving on doesn’t mean that one has not found meaning of OR has failed to make meaning of his past, it simply means that one has CHOSEN not to dwell in the past. You have no control of the past, but you certainly have full control over how you handle your emotions right HERE and NOW.

I think I am happy because I chose to be happy, regardless of the situation. (I mean I have a way of purging negative energy, for example, I like to moan and groan, [much to the chagrin of Kris] to expel the negative energy from within) BUT then after the moaning and groaning, I CHOSE to focus instead of the GOOD that is currently happening in my life. I think thats the whole point of Project Grateful 365. I want to transform the way that I think, I want to be happier and more grateful of life. Life will always be tough from time to time, but life has also been so wonderful to me [and most probably you] in so many ways. In my opinion, in order to be happy, one just has to CHOOSE to focus on the good that HAS happened, IS happening and be optimistic enough to believe good things WILL eventually happen.

It sounds so easy and simplistic, but it took me such a long time to get here. I hope that whoever chances upon this blog, will also be inspired and realize that happiness is actually THAT easy.

So today I’m grateful that I finally found an easy way to be happy and I hope you’ll be happy too! 

Here’s my happy Moosey hat! It is very cute and makes me very happy! 

When I bought it, Kris was like, ‘Are you sure you dare to wear this out?’

I pondered for a few moments and decided that wearing this cute hat makes me happy and why should I give a RAT’s ass about what others think?

So perhaps, not giving a RAT’s ass to the opinion of others from time to time helps achieve simplistic happiness too!

Project Grateful 365: Day 12

Honestly, its quite hard to be upbeat today, I’m annoyed at all the visa paperwork, the amount of money we spent and how incompetent the agencies are! (Just received more paperwork to be done today) 1.5 years, mountains of paperwork and thousands of dollars just to get a 2 years conditional green card is just unacceptable!

BUT I chose to be grateful! I’m grateful that the longest wait is over and it WILL ALL BE OVER SOON!

Anyways, the most important thing I’ve chosen to be grateful for today is a friend called J that I’ve found in an online immigration forum. (Which mostly consists of people going through the same hell: giving advice and asking for advice about what to do next 😛 )

Nobody really understands what I’m going through, because they just don’t get the sheer complexity of all the paperwork. (Heck even I don’t understand what I’m supposed to do most of the time because they are so vague, rude and just condescending when you call up to clarify)  Most people don’t understand how hard it is to be apart from your fiancee, how financially burdensome it is to have to shell out thousands of dollars to fly back and forth. How emotionally tiring everything is, unless you’re the one involved.

HOWEVER!!!!!

About a few months ago, I met someone from the forum: a fellow Singaporean who knows exactly how I feel because she’s going through the same thing, and its so awesomely comforting to have a person who gets you.

So today, I’m grateful that I’ve found this new friend, grateful to have somebody talk to and ‘strategize’ what to do next, every painful step of this immigration journey.

So thank you J, for always providing a comforting listening ear, giving advice, encouragement, hope and empathy!

Project Grateful 365: Day 11

Today I am grateful for a hubbabot that ‘lies to me’ appropriately.

Haha!

Okay context!

I was looking at this photo and going, “Look at this KRIS! how cute is Isaiah!!!!!!!.”

Kris: Yeah thats pretty cute, but not as cute as YOU!

Me: Oh, C’mon there is no way I’m as cute as him

Kris: What do you mean? You’re the cutest thing in the world!

Me: *probably lying, but I’ll take the compliment anyways!” hahahhaaa

Project Grateful 365: Day 10

Today I am grateful for Mr Sexy Lips

He was up in arms because he claims that this picture is too risque!

#facepalm#

I feel like I’m dating someone from the 18th century!

Anyhow to placate him I’ve decided to moderate this post with a picture of

Mr Micro Sexy Lips and Sister Sexy Lips

There you go, 3 of my favorite people in this world!

Project Grateful Day 9

Today I’m grateful that I’ve cooked a big meal without glitches! We invited the Tobbacks’ over for dinner to thank them for letting us crash on their living room during Sandy when we were homeless and all. *hee hee*

Menu for today

1) Spinach Salad with avocados, tomatoes and mushrooms

2) Baked BBQ chicken + Baked potatoes

3) Beef Shepard’s Pie

4) Red Velvet Cake

*Photos to come*

**** Edit 17th Nov 2012

2 pictures only coz I was too enamored by the Tobback’s little toddler (Roan). He was so super cute!

Shepard’s Pie (Up) and Happy Red Velvet Cake (Down)

This is what his mum sent me after they left!

Oh man! That little heart breaker! Can’t wait to see him again! And his parents too of course! *heh heh*

Project Grateful 365: Day 8

15th Nov 2012

Today I am grateful that we 1) Managed to sell OIA without much problems 2) Had happy eggs for breakfast.

 

1. Well we did make a 20k lost on the boat. The positive side is that it got sold really quickly, as compared to before when we first bought it and it was on the market for like 2 years. I guess my awesome botman did a great job with his little DIY project. It’s really his HARD earned money and he seems to be A-OKAY with the lost and justifies it with learning a lot from it and ‘You cannot put value on knowledge blah blah, all the things I’ve learnt totally justifies the cost, blah blah’. *insert rolly eyes* Nonetheless, if he’s happy, I’m happy for him. More importantly, I’m extremely happy that I am sitting in a nice apartment typing this entry and not sailing across the South China Sea or Atlantic ocean puking my guts out! So DEAR LORD JESUS CHRIST, thank you for making Kris see the light of not sailing and giving him a wonderful job opportunity! 😛

By now you would have realized that I am not the sailing type, but when the love of your life tells you its his childhood dream to sail across the world, you can’t really say, ‘NO, DONT DO THAT, that’s my worse nightmare!!!!!’. I had to at least say, ‘I’ll try till Japan.’ The truth is, I’ll probably have ditched him in Phuket and said, ‘See you in Vancouver’, which is our intended destination. Hee Hee. Or maybe, I would have loved it and decided that I love sailing and want to circumnavigate the globe. Now I will never know, but I can’t say that I mind not having that option! :PPPPPP

(Now that took a while!)

2. I am also grateful for having a nice kitchen to make yummy breakfasts like this.

Behold Mr and Mrs Happy Eggs