I found this off the Facebook wall of Y and found myself pondering about this quote/short prose for a long time.
“Unhappy men are all alike. Some wound they suffered long ago, some wish denied, some blow to pride, some kindling spark of love put out by scorn- or worse, indifference- cleaves to them, or they to it, and so they live each day within a shroud of yesterdays. The happy man does not look back. He doesn’t look ahead. He lives in the present.
But there’s the rub. The present can never deliver one thing: meaning. The ways of happiness and meaning are not the same. To find happiness, a man need only live in the moment; he need only live for the moment. But if he wants meaning – the meaning of his secrets, his life – a man must reinhabit his past, however dark, and live for the future, however uncertain. Thus nature dangles happiness and meaning before us all, insisting only that we choose between them.”
– Jed Rubenfeld, The Interpretation of Murder
I don’t quite agree with the dichotomy he presents between happiness and meaning but yet there is still a grain of truth in his wonderfully phrased prose. Personally however, the core of my being still feels that one can be happy living in the moment, yet be introspective about his past. I mean you have two choices, you can recognize and make meaning of an event happened, choose to stay and moan about things or just move on. Moving on doesn’t mean that one has not found meaning of OR has failed to make meaning of his past, it simply means that one has CHOSEN not to dwell in the past. You have no control of the past, but you certainly have full control over how you handle your emotions right HERE and NOW.
I think I am happy because I chose to be happy, regardless of the situation. (I mean I have a way of purging negative energy, for example, I like to moan and groan, [much to the chagrin of Kris] to expel the negative energy from within) BUT then after the moaning and groaning, I CHOSE to focus instead of the GOOD that is currently happening in my life. I think thats the whole point of Project Grateful 365. I want to transform the way that I think, I want to be happier and more grateful of life. Life will always be tough from time to time, but life has also been so wonderful to me [and most probably you] in so many ways. In my opinion, in order to be happy, one just has to CHOOSE to focus on the good that HAS happened, IS happening and be optimistic enough to believe good things WILL eventually happen.
It sounds so easy and simplistic, but it took me such a long time to get here. I hope that whoever chances upon this blog, will also be inspired and realize that happiness is actually THAT easy.
So today I’m grateful that I finally found an easy way to be happy and I hope you’ll be happy too!
Here’s my happy Moosey hat! It is very cute and makes me very happy!
When I bought it, Kris was like, ‘Are you sure you dare to wear this out?’
I pondered for a few moments and decided that wearing this cute hat makes me happy and why should I give a RAT’s ass about what others think?
So perhaps, not giving a RAT’s ass to the opinion of others from time to time helps achieve simplistic happiness too!